Is your son or daughter a victim? Study: Half of high school students admit bullying in last year

Study: Half of high school students admit bullying in last year (Click here for full story)

This statistic is sad but doesn't surprise me. Many times when we think about self-defense we only think about the attacker in the street and we forget to think about our kids at school. I know this scene all to well and it is scary and has long-term negative affects on your child.

Growing up I was very small because of some medical issues that made me more weak and unable to participate in sports. I had an enlarged spleen that if hit or bumped too hard would cause internal bleeding that would have been the death of me in mins. Because I was smaller, weaker, and couldn't play sports I was the target of a lot of bullying. From games of taking my hat and coat in the winter to full on pounding by multiple assailants. I was probably like a lot of kids and never told my parents because what could they honestly do (at least that is what I thought at the time). So I suffered through it and took it year after year.

As I got older it did start to get bigger but I was behind in being good at sports and sported some large frame glasses didn't help my "coolness" factor.  I remember from very young age, because of my situation, I wanted to learn martial arts or karate or something so I wasn't taken advantage of any more. Unfortunately, my parents only saw the value of paying for music lessons and I never got any training to protect myself that I wanted. My bullying continued all the way from elementary to high school and its affects had longer term repercussions. Through all that bullying what I learned was how to continue to take abuse. I am certain this  was one of the major factors that drove me to cower to the demands of aggressive abuser (my first wife). Only after a week of dating I felt I was bullied into dropping out of college and then had to suffer through an emotional abusive marriage for the next six and half years! It wasn't until I empowered myself and then trained myself to stand against any threat did I get out of that damaging cycle and marriage and go on to lead a more healthy successful life. (Growing to 6'3'' and putting on 30lbs of muscle helped too but the training did more.)

Bullying has huge long term consequence other then the physical damages it can cause. If your child is being bullied and they don't know how to stop it, they are learning to become victims. They are learning that the aggressive have the power and they must just suffer through it or be subjected to it. The only way to change this is to teach them how to empower themselves. Self-defense is not just about keeping a bad guy from killing you if you were mugged. Self-defense is empowering yourself to appropriately handle a threatening situation no matter where and when it happens. It is training and preparing to handle even the most extreme situations effectively so you and your loved ones walk away safe. Self-defense certainly applies to stopping bullying.

If you child knows that if someone attacked them they would know what to do to handle the situation, they will have more self-esteem and be willing to do more. They will feel better about themselves knowing they do not have to be a victim of others. If they feel strong, empowered, and capable they are less likely to be targeted by bullies in the first place. Remember aggressors are most likely to target those that they feel like they can easily overpower. An empowered child carries themselves different and interacts with others much different then one that feels they cant or are incapable.

Training your child in self-defense does not dispose them to fight more or to feel like they can beat anyone up. Good self-defense training will teach your child discipline, hard work, setting goals and work towards those goals, as well as avoid a confrontation if you can. It will also teach them control and what kind of force to use for which situation. Though not all self-defense training is equal as far as its effectiveness in different situations (especially the extreme or lethal situations) almost all will give your child good foundation and if they stick with it, it should help them be able to handle most bullying situations.

Don't let you child become a lifetime victim. Find a good self-defense or martial arts school that supports your goals of helping and empowering them so that they feel like they could defend themselves if they needed to. Even if you don't think your child is being bullied realize that statistic shows that at least half of kids are. So don't be naive at your kids expense because must likely one of your kids is being bullied. Give them the skills to handle this and they will fear far less in their life later on. Give them the tools to empower themselves and they will have one of the keys of Ultimate Defense.